Movies about pregnancy are usually predictable. You get the morning sickness montage, the frantic hospital drive, and a sentimental ending. But You Me & Him—the 2017 British film directed by Daisy Aitkens—decided to do something much messier. It didn't want to be a Hallmark card. It wanted to be a complicated, sometimes cringey, very human look at what happens when a lesbian couple and their neighbor all end up expecting at the exact same time.
It’s weird. It’s colorful. Honestly, it’s a bit polarizing.
The film stars Lucy Punch and Faye Marsay as Olivia and Alex. They are at completely different stages of life despite being in a committed relationship. Olivia is a high-flying, slightly uptight lawyer in her 40s. Alex is a drifting artist in her 20s. The tension is already there before the "him" of the title, played by David Tennant, enters the frame as their annoying but strangely present neighbor, John. When both women fall pregnant—one through a clinical procedure and the other through a drunken mistake with John—the "traditional" family unit gets tossed out the window.
The Reality of You Me & Him vs. The Rom-Com Trope
Most people go into this movie expecting a lighthearted romp because David Tennant is on the poster wearing a ridiculous wig. But You Me & Him actually digs into some pretty uncomfortable territory regarding age gaps and reproductive rights. It’s not just a "who's the daddy" story.
Olivia is desperate for a child. She's spent thousands. She's stressed.
Alex? She’s barely sure she wants to be an adult, let alone a mother.
When Alex ends up pregnant by John, the film shifts from a comedy of errors into a genuine exploration of resentment. If you've ever been in a relationship where one person is doing all the "heavy lifting" while the other just drifts along, these scenes will probably hit a nerve. The film doesn't shy away from the fact that Alex’s pregnancy feels like a betrayal to Olivia, not just because of the sex, but because of the ease of it. Nature is unfair. That is a core theme here.
Lucy Punch is actually the standout. We’re used to seeing her play the "mean girl" or the eccentric comedic relief in things like Motherland or Hot Fuzz. Here, she’s vulnerable. You feel her biological clock ticking like a time bomb. It’s a performance that grounds a movie that occasionally threatens to become too "zany" for its own good.
Why the David Tennant Factor Matters
Let’s talk about John. David Tennant plays him as a sort of "hipster mid-life crisis" personified. He’s grieving his wife, he’s lonely, and he’s incredibly intrusive. In a lesser film, John would be the villain or a simple punchline. Instead, Aitkens writes him as a catalyst.
He represents the "Him" that complicates the "You & Me."
Interestingly, the movie was produced by Georgia Tennant (David's wife), and it feels like a family affair. There’s an intimacy to the scenes in their shared garden that feels lived-in. However, some critics at the time—including reviews from The Guardian—pointed out that the film struggles to balance its tone. Is it a broad comedy? Is it a tear-jerker? It tries to be both. Sometimes that works. Sometimes it feels like tonal whiplash.
The Queer Cinema Context
For a long time, lesbian stories in cinema were either tragedies or hyper-sexualized. You Me & Him belongs to a newer wave of "post-coming out" stories. The fact that they are a lesbian couple isn't the "problem" of the movie. The problem is their communication, their egos, and their fears. That’s progress, even if the movie itself has flaws.
It treats a queer household with the same messy, frustrating, and chaotic energy usually reserved for straight ensembles.
What the Critics Got Wrong (and Right)
When the film hit the festival circuit and later streaming services, the reception was mixed. Rotton Tomatoes scores reflect a divide between people who loved the British charm and those who found the plot contrivances a bit too much to swallow.
- The "Wacky Neighbor" trope can feel dated.
- The dialogue is snappy, but occasionally feels scripted rather than organic.
- The cinematography is bright and poppy, which sometimes masks the darker emotional beats.
But honestly? It’s better than the 50% scores suggest. If you watch it as a character study of three people who are all terrified of the future, it carries a lot more weight. It’s about the family you choose—and the family that accidentally chooses you.
Behind the Scenes: The Daisy Aitkens Vision
Daisy Aitkens wrote and directed this as her feature debut. That’s a massive undertaking. She managed to pull in a high-caliber cast, likely due to her connections in the UK acting scene, but her voice is distinct. She likes characters who make bad decisions.
In an industry that often demands "likable" female leads, Aitkens gives us Alex—who is frequently selfish—and Olivia—who can be incredibly cold. It’s refreshing. It’s real. People in crisis aren't always nice. They snap. They lie. They drink too much gin when they shouldn't.
Actionable Takeaways for Your Next Watch
If you’re planning to dive into You Me & Him, or if you’re a filmmaker looking at how to handle ensemble dramedies, keep these points in mind:
- Look past the wig: David Tennant’s character is more than a caricature; watch his arc regarding grief.
- Observe the power dynamics: Pay attention to how the film handles the "power" in the relationship as the pregnancies progress. It flips several times.
- Compare to modern peers: Contrast this with shows like Workin' Moms or The Kids Are All Right. You'll see where it fits in the evolution of "messy parenting" media.
- Check the soundtrack: The music selection is specifically curated to heighten the indie-pop vibe of the film, which helps bridge the gaps between the comedy and the drama.
Whether you're there for the Tennant-Punch chemistry or you just want a British comedy that isn't set in a chocolate-box village, this film offers a specific kind of chaotic energy. It’s a reminder that there’s no such thing as a "normal" way to start a family. Life happens, usually at the most inconvenient time possible, and you just have to figure out who is going to hold the ladder while you change the lightbulb.
The film remains a staple on various streaming platforms like Amazon Prime and digital storefronts. It’s a solid Friday night watch if you want something that feels like a conversation with a slightly chaotic friend. You won't agree with every choice they make, but you'll be glad you listened to the story.
